There is always something that goes on behind the scenes. I think we can all agree on that.
This is true in the movies, in TV shows, and in life. And, especially in the movies, we love it. We love to see the plot twists. We love for our beloved characters to be developed and for them to go through something we never saw coming.
In life though, we aren’t always as big of a fan in the story behind the story.
We aren’t all that enthralled with the story behind the story because often it enlightens our mind and our heart to the fact that not all is as good as it seems from the outside looking in. This is especially true in leadership. A leader is someone who influences others. Now, that influence can be both positive or it can be negative. When a leader is good at what they do, when they’re sincere, when people follow them and believe in their cause…we love to follow their story. And, often times we may wonder and think, “I wonder what they are really like”? So often, we really don’t ever get the chance to know the leaders we follow. I mean, we know them from afar and know some of their thoughts from Facebook and twitter, but rarely do we get a chance to sit with them and actually hear their heart.
Because I love relationships and I love to hear people’s stories, that’s why I’m always curious with their Story behind the Story.
You see, it’s really easy to present our Story to the world. It’s easy because we can craft it anyway we want.
But, it’s not so easy to give our world the real story behind our story. Our story behind the story is real offering of what is going on in our heart. And, that’s scary to share. Honestly, that’s hard to deal with on our own.
I have met so many people who have been so burned emotionally and mentally because they took the plunge to share their story behind the story with someone. Everyone had moments in elementary school when we told our friend a secret, only to find out they told someone else or the rest of the class. And the amazing thing is…we can still remember when that happened! The reality is…it still happens to adults.
We take the plunge and decided to be transparent and authentic with someone, only to find out that they share our story behind the story with someone else. When that happens, often, we feel betrayed and then we start to put the walls back up. We put the walls up to protect our heart and emotions from the pain of getting hurt and we begin to protect our story behind the story.
There’s always a story behind the story. So often as a leader, people have approached me and said…”Ok, what’s really gone on” or “What’s the real story”? People ask that when they begin to sniff out the reality that there is a story that doesn’t seem to make sense and they want to real details. They want the truth and they want to know what’s really going on.
Have you met someone that just doesn’t give you much of their story? You may work with them and one day you find out that their family is going through a tough time and when you act surprised, it doesn’t even register with them that they could have told you much sooner. Or, you build a relationship with someone and it’s going well and you start to notice that they never seem to want to go deeper. Deeper is a good thing for relationships. Deeper is a sign of trust and a seal that the bond of this friendship is going to last. It’s hard when only one person in the relationship will tread to those waters.
So, what’s your Story behind the Story?
What’s holding you back from sharing it with someone you’ve been building a relationship with?